Before I found Project Rachel I truly didn't think that healing from my abortions was even possible. I was a bundle of angst and tension always looking for something deeper to satisfy the emptiness. I had never really spoken to anyone about what I had done. I swept it under the rug pretending like it hadn't happened.
I carried this guilt and hatred of myself around for so long and was so tired of it. I finally came home to Christ, but still could not find the forgiveness I needed.
One day in church, during praise and worship, I heard the words Pro Life like a whisper in my ear. I took that as a sign that I would be volunteering my time with the organization. Little did I know that God had a wonderful program waiting for me at the other end of the email I sent to Nova Scotians United For Life that would start me on my healing journey.
I reluctantly called the facilitator and the moment we started speaking I knew this was where I was supposed to be. I realized that God had forgiven me long before I was even aware of the abundance of His mercy.
The Project Rachel program has helped me heal when for years I thought it was impossible to do so. God is the only way to heal from this painful decision.
After such a loss, you despair that your life will ever become peaceful again. You ask yourself, “Will I ever be the same or will I ever be happy again?” But there is HOPE. There is hope in God’s word and His faithfulness to His promise.
Dear Doctor,
Many years ago you were the surgeon who was assigned to perform an abortion on a patient --- that person was me.
I just want to tell you that mommy and daddy love you so much. I am so sorry for the decision that was made that did not enable you to enjoy the warmth of our hands.
What a joy to finally be writing to you! I didn’t really know you were out there. To think that you have known me all this time, and I have not known you, is a little strange but also a blessing. A blessing that your ‘slow’ mother has got with the program and been in touch, at last, with her beautiful daughter.
Dear Ben and Emily
Where do I begin? I begin by asking you both to forgive me. To have a second chance with you. That I may be able to show my love for you both, each and every day until I am able to meet with you both again.
